Pessimistic Politics: Excuse Me for Feeling Unpatriotic

I apologize for the overly harsh tone of this article. I wrote most of this after taking on a unexpectedly twelve hour day on five hours of sleep. During that time, I decided to take a different route home, and due to a huge oversight on my part, ended up driving through two towns in the sticks. After arriving home an hour late, I had to deal with my ailing mother’s irate requests for dinner. I’m significantly calmed between now and then, having settled down with Arby’s and some episodes of Heat Guy J, but I still feel there are a few important political issues that came out of my enraged thoughts, mostly involving the price of gas. Enjoy…

It has come to my attention that there are idiots running this country. Actually, I knew that ever since the Big Idiot stepped into office way back in 2001. The thing is, Bush was pretty harmless back then, just a bumbling dumb guy that the country really didn’t want. However, since we’re still using an obsolete electoral system and Al Gore couldn’t hire enough lawyers, we got stuck with him. I want to state now that I think what happened in 2000, both then and in retrospect, shouldn’t have. The American people clearly chose Gore, but the Powers That Be wanted Bush, probably because he would play ball. The significance of this only sinks in now in 2005, after we made the same mistake twice and elected him again. Our country really needs help, and our leaders aren’t budging.

I want to make it clear that I didn’t vote for Bush then, when it was a choice between dumb and dumber. I voted dumb, just because Clinton’s administration was really good (despite what Republicans will tell you), and I figured that even though Gore was stiff as a dry spaghetti noodle, maybe he would work out okay because of the halo effect. Most everyone else voted for Gore, too, but were foiled by the electoral college.

The thing is, many want the system to move to a direct vote for the presidential election. As of this writing, over seven-hundred bills have been proposed to change it, all shot down. Sure, the system worked when accurate individual voter counting was tougher to do, and yes, the current system does offer an artificial balance to the system, but I don’t see why we can’t just go with the popular vote now, or at least alter the electoral college to reflect the will of the people. I mean, that’s what the people really want, right? This is a democracy, isn’t it?

I think it was a rude awakening. If the people in power really want things to sway a certain way, they can do it, regardless of what the Constitution says. I think we can safely blame the Republicans on this one. It should come as no surprise that the Republicans, who, by stereotype, lose their humanity the moment they taste power, want to make sure the power stays as far away from the people as they can keep it without starting an uprising.

This power struggle really makes me sick. At what point does a person cease to be a person and transform into government? Remember that, like most things, government itself isn’t inherently corrupt, it’s the morons who run the government that are corrupt. On that same token, the people running things can make it good, too. Even totalitarian and communist (treason!) governments can be good for the people if those in charge are good, but when they’re bad, the people get screwed.

The people running the government are only human. Even the president is only human, backed by many other humans that you don’t even know about. Think about that the next time he makes a mistake. I’m not dismissing his stupidity. In fact, I think that he has to learn to take more responsibility for his decisions and his humanity if he’s going to be in such a powerful position and occupy it with confidence.

Look at the 2004 debates, when our great leader was getting visibly pissy because Kerry didn’t agree with him. This is a man who has been surrounded by advisors who tell him what to do and agree with his opinions. Sure, everyone needs help, and it’s good that these decisions are somewhat informed ones, but for the love of God, leave your ego at the door. I don’t think Bush is very good at this. I don’t advise looking up to this man as something more than a man. Don’t look up to him in awe, because he’s just as dumb as the rest of us.

Anyway, back to the 2000 elections. When all was said in done, it didn’t really matter who was president. We really didn’t need a president, what with the relative peace and all, so who cares if he’s an idiot? No one’s going to listen to him anyway.

Then September Eleventh happened. After the dead were buried and the tears were shed, we were ready to go after those who cut us so deeply. We looked up to our leader for the inspiration to guide us through this time of tragedy and turmoil. I’ll admit Bush did send the troops off to get the bad guys, he at least acted. I’m also going to forgo mocking him for how he sat in that elementary school, in front of that class, for so long after he was informed about the attacks. It was clear he was afraid and confused, that he didn’t know what to do. Why not? We hadn’t been hit so hard since Pearl Harbor. It was serious.

America’s patriotism swelled to new heights. People dusted off their flags (or bought new ones, since there were plenty of businesses generously selling them at full price) and hoisted them high into the air. “Proud to be an American” bumper stickers were slapped on every broken-down pickup to mid-class luxury cars around the nation (I don’t remember too many upper-tier cars bearing these stickers. Chalk that up to bad memory or the owners not wanting to scuff their paint job). More national anthems played in the following months than in most decades. It was a time to be proud of our citizens for holding up the symbol of their country, clamoring for its honor.

I wasn’t fooled. When I saw the stores selling full-priced Americana, I knew that they were just selfishly taking advantage of Americans’ new-found loyalty. When I saw all of the “Proud to Be an American” bumper stickers, I knew there was a solid chance that it belonged to an idiot who was just blindly following the masses It reminded me of a Fourth of July outing I was at, when a drunken moron shouted “Proud to be an American!” only when the pretty lights and sounds reached their crescendo. There were no other words to express his excitement at the time, so he made due. No doubt he went on to complain about the country as usual later that night, his proclamation forgotten. National anthems were played at all hours to keep the loyalty, and the profits, from faltering.

Before most of my readers decry me for bashing American patriotism, let me remind all of you that it turns out my estimations of how long it would last were generous. I figured that the whole American patriotism fad would die down around mid-spring and then see a resurgence on the Fourth of July. The patriotism fad actually died earlier, in late-winter, and there was no real additional excitement on the Fourth. Americans, once again, were more interested in their Chinese fireworks and German beer than of their nation. They actually managed to disappoint me.

Then we started going after Saddam. Let me state for the record that I think Saddam was a very bad person who needed to be taken down, that much I agree with. It’s just hard not to believe that Bush decided to take him out for the reason that Saddam tried to kill his daddy.

There have also been accusations that the war was about Middle Eastern oil, of which our vice president, Dick Cheney, has a great interest in, as he has stakes in an oil company. When C was over in the war, he and the troops would routinely talk about how they were fighting for Cheney’s Oil Company. Whether or not they were just kidding around is hard to tell, but my instincts tell me they weren’t joking. This is terrible, since thousands of Americans lost their lives in this war, even more have lost mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, friends and family. The war started as a means of bringing terrible monsters to justice. What is it for now?

Before I go on, I want to comment on the war frenzy that was whipped up over the course of 2002 and 2003. Specifically, I want to comment on all of the anti-Arab cartoons that were popular at the time. Okay, I know that these comics were supposed to be mocking the terrorists, but in doing so, they drew up a caricature of all people from the Middle East, using the culture as part of the jokes. People laughed it up as the cartoonist made fun of the terrorists, but I think the irony is lost on a lot of those yucksters.

Case in point: in the spring of 2004, I was doing a report on World War II cartoons and the depictions of the enemy, specifically the Japanese, and how they used these images to dehumanize the enemy (for more information on WWII cartoons, head over to Encyclopedia Obscura, which inspired me to research the topic in the first place). When the presentation was over, the opinionated girl of the class proclaimed that the depictions of the Japanese were “disgusting” and she couldn’t believe that Disney would have produced them. I countered by saying that the depictions of Arabs in cartoons nowadays aren’t that far off from what was in those shorts.

The only difference was the shorts were when the Japanese were the monsters and the cartoons are for now (well, a year ago), when the Arabs are the monsters. It’s the same thing, and it was wrong, but we didn’t see it that way. I’m sure generations after now will look back on us with the same disgust that we look back on the WWII era. In fact, I think people will look back at the whole Iraqi war and wonder why we didn’t do anything to stop it, but that’s another article.

It should come as no surprise that I watched and was enamored with Michael Moore’s Fahrenheit 9/11. Now I know it was extremely left wing, but I think between the tales Republicans tell us and Moore’s documentary lies the truth. In fact, I tend to believe Moore is closer to the truth than the other side is. Why else would someone feel it necessary to release a DVD that tries to dismiss Fahrenheit 9/11 as an extremist’s fantasy? I especially like the part when Moore tried to get war-supporting senators to send their kids over to the war. Spoiled brats.

The truth of Moore’s words, however, don’t matter to me as much when compared to the footage of what Bush’s war was doing to the citizens of the country we were supposed to be saving (as was the later reason), I, for the first time since my childhood friend was sent over to fight, was emotionally wrecked by this war. Women cried, men resisted, and they all hated us, you, me, every American, for what we were doing to them in our righteous march for freedom. Our nation has done some boneheaded things in its position of power, but I can honestly say, as I fought back tears when the thought of what our leader was instructing our soldiers to do to these innocent people nagged at me, I was never more ashamed to be an American.

War is an ugly thing, and being a white, suburbanite male, I say this only from observation. I understand that war is chaos, that control is a luxury, but after the bullets stopped flying for a little while, why did our righteous crusaders torture their captives? I understand they were shooting at them not long before, but aren’t they supposed to be “better” than the enemy?

And after all that trouble, after all of the unconfirmed reports and guesses, after we finally caught Saddam, what happened to him? You never hear about him these days. Why is it that we’re more interested in Martha Steward than a man that wanted to kill EVERY AMERICAN HE COULD. They got their man, isn’t the fighting over?

Even if it could be over, it won’t be so easily, because war is profitable. As discussed in George Orwell’s 1984, war can rally the citizens, strengthen the government, and cause artificial supply shortages, all of which keep the government in control. When Michael Moore quoted from 1984 at the end of Fahrenheit 9/11, I stared at the screen in horror, because he was onto something. The Thought Police may not be knocking at your door, but Big Brother is watching. Look at our oil supply. I can’t dismiss the feeling that the war is still going on in order to fuel corporations who, like government, are only as evil as the people who run them.

On the home front, we’ve seen some bad things happen to us, courtesy of our leaders. Social security and health care are in desperate need of reform, yet our leaders are more concerned about military spending and homeland security. What a joke. I mean, yes, 9/11 certainly happened, but how are we accomplishing anything by hassling old ladies at the airport?

And what the hell is this “terrorist warning level” crap? What’s the point? How do you know when a terrorist attack “might” happen? And why are you panicking the citizens? If there’s a threat, go and do something about it instead of making us live in fear, you numbskulls.

And what’s with this “Support our Troops” fad? It seems like “support our troops” means “give five bucks to a flea-market vendor for a cheap sticker and they promise to send the money to the troops.” Instead of wasting our money on this tripe, let’s send the money DIRECTLY TO THE TROOPS. Better yet, let’s support our troops by getting a new leader that supports our troops by getting them back home, safe and sound, where they belong.

Bush is interested in giving us tax cuts. Great, but what good does a five-percent (this is an example) cut do for the average Joe verses the Big Evil Corporation? Joe saves $1000, if he’s lucky, but Big Evil saves millions while shipping jobs out of the country because they can save even more. Prices will rise, politicians will pillage, and you too will watch as the job market continues to get cauterized shut.

What about the recent proposal to raise minimum wage? The current $5.15 an hour is too little; it’s a completely obsolete figure when compared to inflation. Yet the Republicans sweep this issue aside, not wanting to upset the Big Corporations. Let’s face it: there are no true Republican children making minimum wage.

I don’t get this. If you raise minimum wage, each worker pays more in taxes. Then, you can lower the taxes for each company to compensate, making them happy. Same money, smaller impact on the individual worker, and the government gets more taxes as the worker gets more raises. You’ll get better workers who are seeking the higher paying jobs, and the economy will pick up.

But no, Republicans prefer to raise the economy up via high gas prices. This sickens me. As a nation that shuns all non-gasoline powered forms of transportation (I mean, really, our highways aren’t made for biking or walking), we need decent gas prices. Unfortunately, no one is promising to even try and help the problem. I thought we conquered the land with all of the oil. These countries owe us a lot of money for our effort on their behalf. COLLECT THE DAMN OIL AND BRING IT OVER HERE.

Even if that isn’t enough, we have the emergency oil supply. Remember that? Bill Clinton, the last GOOD president, wanted desperately to crack it open when prices were getting out of hand, but the Republicans didn’t want that. Bush? Not a peep. Why should he? Dick wouldn’t be very happy if his product had a lot of supply.

And before any of you say that Bush has no control over these things, I say that’s a sack of lies. He’s now the MOST POWERFUL MAN IN THE WORLD. We protect him with everything we’ve got. We don’t want this guy, despite arguments to the contrary, to die. He’s important because he controls these things. If he didn’t, we wouldn’t even bother.

Let me tell you how much of a big deal this guy is. Back in the spring of 2004 (busy season), Bush himself visited Owens Community College, which coincidentally is the college that I attend. My girlfriend and I were driving in for class just before ten in the morning, which is when Bush decided to come down the road. Of course, they closed the road off completely, so evil terrorists like me couldn’t take a shot at him.

We pulled into a nearby hotel parking lot, which was next to a gas station that was next to the intersection that Bush was using. My intention was to wait it out there, but the vigilant police officer that was blocking the street had other ideas. He shouted for me to get out of the car. Confused, we slowly got out of the car. Apparently, they didn’t want us tearing through the gas station parking lot down at the president, so we were forced to hang out at the hotel for a while.

Before long, we were allowed on our way, but, of course, I was late for class. That’s right: George W. Bush made me late for class. I should send him a bill for my missing class time, even though I was usually late for that class anyway.

And what was this event all about? Mostly, it was a way for Bush to appear noble while the president of the college jabbered on about how great the school was, to a point where Bush (big surprise) was looking pretty annoyed (I actually have the footage on DVD, which is rare and actually better than CNN’s, mostly because my boss’s head was in their shot. Look for a posting on this page at some point). Of course, students were viewed as a serious security threat, so they weren’t allowed in, save for the half dozen or so they let in to make it look like administration cared. Mostly, it was the big wigs and their friends that got in. All the students got were security hassles and less parking. Oh, and angry protesters who were mad for the stupid reason that their jobs were disappearing. There were a lot of those.

All this for a man who isn’t supposed to have all that much power. He does have power, he just isn’t sharing the wealth.

Later that year, when the election results were announced in 2004, I was thoroughly depressed. Despite the controversy surrounding Bush, the Democrats still couldn’t pick a better candidate, instead opting for a guy that the people thought could be WORSE than Bush. If Gore had just accepted his unjust defeat in 2000, he would probably have run again, and we would have a new president for sure, as sort of an apology to him for being wrong. But we got Kerry, and somehow, people were worried he would bite worse than Bush. All I can say is, no matter what, don’t blame me, I voted for Kerry.

There’s a lot more, but I’m too flustered to think about any more. I know a lot of my readers are ready to lynch me for being a traitor, but let me just say that despite my skepticism of patriotism and my well-founded ire for the Bush administration, I still love this country. I love its freedom, I love its people, I love its culture. Sure, sometime the freedom is taken away by idiots, who make up a large portion of the population, and sometimes American culture annoys me to no end because of its obsession with fads and its lack of substance, but with all it’s quirks (and every country has them, no just us), I still love this nation and want to see it prosper.

I know a lot of you have probably abandon the article by now and are prepared to type up angry letters, probably containing something to the effect that it’s way worse in many, many other countries. All I can say is: you spoiled brat. Because we live in this great nation, you’re allowed to express your opinions without fear of government retribution, at least not in the form of a public execution. Just because other countries have it bad doesn’t mean we have to lower our own standards out of pity. What good can we do as a nation, a nation that is prosperous enough to help other nations, when are idea of “helping” is to feel bad about how good we have it? Each of you is fortunate to live in this country, and it’s a damned shame that many prefer to throw it away by pitying yourselves for being so lucky.

I honestly believe it won’t get better under this administration. I know we can’t impeach Bush for no reason (okay, there are many good ones, but nothing legal), but I think the Toxic Texan needs a good slap in the face so he can ride out his term without breaking anything else. I’m just glad that it’ll all be over in 2009, when the next guy steps up to the plate. I just hope we don’t get stuck with Bush III. Thank you.