Pessimistic Politics: Posers Polluting the Pious Places

It’s time once again for me to talk a little bit about religion.

Before the lot of you let out a mass moan, let me take this opportunity to state that this is one of the few times that I’m going to be saying something evidently positive about organized religion. I’m sure that my message of mutual acceptance has been far overshadowed by my nasty criticism (okay, I’ve been aiming it at one guy, but still), so let me state once and for all that I don’t deny any religion to be false, since there’s no way of proving any of it. In fact, taken in the proper dose, faith in a deity is a wonderful thing that many are privileged to possess.

At times, I wish I could be so optimistic, but for now, I’m satisfied to remain generally neutral at the potential risk of my afterlife in exchange for this opportunity to talk openly about such an important subject without being grounded in it. If God exists as many believe him to, I hope that he would find this noble, but I kind of doubt it.

Actually, I can’t say that I’m not grounded in any one religion, as I was raised in a Lutheran environment and still tag along with my mother to weekly service out of guilt, if nothing else. I’ve been fully baptized and confirmed, so don’t think my foot isn’t on the altar. I fear that because of this, my perception of other religions is too narrow while my knowledge of Christianity makes me come off as rebellious, but that’s for the reader to decide.

To get to the point, I go to church, but I don’t offhandedly believe in what’s being said, whether it's nice or not. Church has long since been a routine for me; I‘ll plainly state that so I don’t come off as more righteous than anyone else just because I had a few drops of water put on my head and I drink wine before noon. I show up, I look pretty, and I leave. I’m not really part of the scene.

So it may seem a little ironic when I express my disappointment in the other parishioners at yesterday’s Easter service. My mother had already gone in at six-thirty for her bell choir performance and roused me for the ten o’clock. I groggily rolled out of bed and took my sweet time getting ready to go to a place I’d rather not, but it was Easter, so what the hell? We arrived a little late, and it really shouldn’t have been a huge surprise that there wasn’t a seat in the house.

We had to sit in the back, the only ones forced to bear the service while sitting on wooden folding chairs. As I squirmed in my chair that was made well before the concept of ergonomics had been invented, I gazed over the crowd and shook my head, annoyed with the lot of them. Why not, since most of them were posers?

I’ve gotten feedback about the attendance records of the church I go to, courtesy of my Catholic girlfriend (yes, I know, Chickians, she’s going to Hell with me), who reports that there are a lot of people there (the church). I was a little surprised, since there are usually plenty of seats available on any given week, so I never thought there were that all that many people attending church. Usually, there are over a hundred a week, so it was never a big deal to me. Imagine what the place was like packed.

This upset me, since most of these people were just here for there semi-yearly church visit (the other, of course, is on Christmas), from that point they would go on feeling like good Christians, even though we’ll never see them again until Christmas. Some of that spite came from the fact that I was suffering it out week after week without a theological reason while these guys felt that they were in God’s good graces because they could be troubled twice a year to come in and pay their respects. I know it probably doesn’t work that way, but I thought I’d mention it. Besides, these posers were taking my seat.

I think that’s where my criticism of religious followers comes in (the casual visitation part, not the taking of my seat part, even if that was annoying). A lot of them expect a great deal out of their relgion but give little in return, whether to the church or their own faith. These are the people who’ve grown up with religion their entire lives and never give it a second thought. They go to church every now and then, maybe give a little in the offering plate, and then they’re off, productive members of their creed. I think these people are almost as bad as the religious psychos. At least the psychos believe in something and put some effort into it, even though that effort can be notoriously dangerous, like a car bombing or a gospel tract.

The point is, a lot of you guys who don’t take your religious beliefs seriously, yet identify yourselves by it have less integrity than the agnostics (people who believe that the truth of God, as it were, is unobtainable either to them or humanity) and the atheists. I’m proud to be an agnostic. I’m glad I got out of Lutheranism when I did, since prolonged exposure might have made me more jaded than I already am. I stopped playing along when I realized I was supposed to believe unquestionably in something that had a lot of unanswered questions. My faith wasn’t strong enough to accept the response “Just have faith.”

Not that I’m saying faith is bad. Quite the opposite, as anything that gives people hope is positive. Okay, there are a lot of exceptions, but religion is supposed to be a relatively personal thing that doesn’t hurt other people. Again, I’m looking at the Chickians for the exception here, and I firmly believe that, though their beliefs may be correct, their techniques of spreading them are just plain wrong. I mean, how positive is it when some yahoo comes up to you and tells you whatever you believe is wrong and here’s proof that can’t be proven?

With that, I call out to all religious followers to take stock in whatever religion you’re involved in and ask yourself if you really believe what it teaches and why. Don’t say “Oh, I’m this religion and so I have to believe this.” Say, “I believe in this because of this.” If you can’t make the connection, I suggest you come over here and join the agnostic pile, or maybe head next door to the atheists, because you aren’t doing your supposed religion any good by hanging around. Well, financially you can, but I’m thinking ideological good here.

As are world diversifies, I think all groups need devout members more than ever. Posers dilute religion and make it lose validity. And as far as I’m concerned, there’s nothing wrong with being an agnostic or an atheist. In fact, those two groups are more righteous than posers because of their lack of pretense. Until we know the Truth (and I don’t think we ever will, at least not until it’s too late), examine your beliefs and go with them, but don’t be something you’re not, since religions need all the help they can get. Thank you.

Okay, I’m finished. I’ll be back again to mock people next time. You can resume sending hate mail then.